The life of not knowing

Bewildered, mind-throttled, broken and restless is what I feel when I am forced to do something. I cannot wait to not do it. because I want to be something else in life :P.

When was the last time you exactly knew what you wanted to be in life? I am sure for most of the people, it is simply the logical choice that everyone around them would approve of. For e.g. a person doing a bachelors in technology should move forward and do a masters in technology or a person studying biology should only go forward and become a doctor.

I am here to argue the logical choice. Why does India produce so many engineers, when a big chunk of them choose different career paths after becoming an engineer? Why do we only consider an engineer or a doctor to be a safe choice? Why can’t my brother learn music? Why can’t my friend become an artist? If you ask people around in your college campus, they would obviously tell you to do what your heart says. But they themselves didn’t. People choose safe shortcuts because other people tell them to. They are not scared of taking the risk, other people scare them off. Imagine a society where no one judges you for your decisions or actions. You could do whatever you like but no one would ask why? You could be whatever you like without thinking about your resume for once.

I am the guy who thought would become the perfect Computer Science graduate when I was in school and so did everybody around me. It was because I got good marks and I was able to crack an exam and not because I genuinely liked Computer Science. People around you create an environment that compels you to do things in order. For a rational being that would mean the safe choice that has been made before. For the past couple of weeks I have been wondering, why am I so scared of everybody around? Why do I think about my peers or the society so much? I want to be a chef!! (just kidding). There it is I thought what you guys would think of me . AGAIN!

Over the course of the past four years, I have learnt one thing and that is you get multiple opportunities at multiple stages of your life. Keep taking chances and keep deciding what you Do not Wanna Do rather than deciding what you wanna do because if you already knew what you wanted to do then you wouldn’t be reading this. I made a list of things I liked when I joined college. Kept trying each and everything, kept striking them off until I got to a point when nothing was left. I had exhausted all my options. Then came this realisation that I had only tried things that others were doing around me and nothing out of ORDER. So I went completely bizarre and tried football, something I neither had the height nor the physique. But I think I have learnt enough to play with some 10 year olds around :P. Now that I have a job and way too much time to write this, I don’t think I want to do what is right in ORDER. I want to get away from this questioning life and I want to do things for myself and others. Read books, gain knowledge and become what i really wanted to become. But I don’t know what I want to become.

Before I end this in all questions, I just want let you all know that this post is not going to change things for you, but for once it will be relaxing to see someone pointing to it. Stop following other people and stop doing what someone else did. Just because they became CEO’s, does not mean you will too become a CEO. I am doing what I like and so should you. Shut everybody around and sleep if you want to.

Before you go, ask yourself this, Why do people not question criminals of what they do after getting out of jail. Its because no one thinks they can change or improve. Consider where you are now as jail and think that no one would care of what you do after you move out because that is exactly what will happen.

— From the unused part of an engineers brain!